Google Business Roundup

Thought the following Fake Steve Jobs list might be interesting funny:

  • Word processor in the cloud. Status: Done. Income: Negligible.
  • Spreadsheet in the cloud. Status: Done. Income: Negligible.
  • Photo storage in the cloud. Status: Done. Income: Negligible.
  • Calendar in the cloud. Status: Done. Income: Zero.
  • Google Earth. Status: Extremely cool.
  • Google Maps. Status: Done. Income: Zero.
  • Google Street View. Status: Not illegal, but should be.
  • Google Talk. Status: Done. Income: Zero.
  • Google Pack. Status: I know it’s around here someplace.
  • Google Ride Finder. Status: Still waiting to get picked up.
  • Google Transit. Status: Lost.
  • TV ads. Status: Uncertain.
  • Radio ads. Status: See “TV ads.”
  • Video game ads. Status: See “Radio ads.”
  • Patent searches. Status: Who cares?
  • RechargeIT hybrid car thing. See here. Status: Hybrid cars, dude.
  • Clean energy. See here. Status: Nice gesture.
  • Google Checkout. Status: Um …
  • Google SketchUp, 3-D modeling. Status: Alpha? Beta?
  • Robots on the moon prize. See here. Status: Robots, dude. On the freaking moon!
  • Google NASA. See here. Status: Awesome!
  • Neven Vision. Image recognition. (Acquired.) Status: Mindblowing.
  • YouTube videos. Status: Done. Income: Negligible.
  • Scanning books. Status: In process. Income: Zero.
  • Blogger. Status: Done. Income: Negligible.
  • RSS Reader. Status: Done. Income: Zero.
  • Google PC. Status: Vapor. Income: Zero.
  • Google OS. Status: Vapor. Income: Zero.
  • Gmail. Status: Done. Income: Negligible or zero.
  • Orkut. Status: Done. Income: Don’t know, I don’t speak Brazilian.
  • OpenSocial. Status: Pipe dream. Income: Zero.
  • VaporPhone ™. Status: Release-ware. Income: Zero.
  • Storage in the cloud. Status: Pre-alpha. Income: Negative.
  • Electricity. Status: Pre-vapor. Income: GBH. (Gonna Be Huge.)
  • Radio airwaves. Status: Bidding. Income: Zero.